As we might imagine, the babies and puppies were easy to influence, so they – and we – owe a big debt of gratitude to the kittens. One rallied the troops by looking at Harper with a dead-eyed who-the-hell-do-you-think-you are stare. That’s all it took.
This is a crew of highly enthusiastic voters, especially once their needs are met.
While the concept of a leader is unimaginable to the kitten voter, she does have curiosity on her side and can be counted on to get the whole picture before she graces the polling booth with her presence. Noting that resentment does fuel the kitten vote; kittens and cats still feel bitter that Harper used them as a humanizing prop.
The top issues for these avid first time voters start with – no kidding – protection of the environment. Beyond that, their collective list of demands include onesies for all, free bite-sized jerky, subsidized pet dental care, and a national strategy to infuse everything with catnip.
Meanwhile, these voters have all pledged to vote against Harper. So, when you run into them at your polling station, make sure to give them a celebratory thumbs up!