The Dogster Is IN

Human vs Harper has been handed a notebook belonging to Dr. Solver A. Dogster. It appears that Dr. Dogster has been hired to run a support group for Conservative MPs and cabinet ministers suffering under the mental strain of having to present a united front behind the Prime Minister.

His notes indicate that he had some hesitation in taking on the job. “All of them together in the same room is a substantial amount of repressed frustration. If one blows, the whole lot will likely explode. It will take all my skill and experience to contain them.”

Proven Idiocy

“Most of the decisions you have to make in this job are hard ones.

“But the toughest decisions I have to make, day in and day out, are the lines for the lackeys’ appearances at Question Period and on Power and Politics.

Tories Kibosh Question Period – We’re Done With That

Following last week’s news that the Conservative Party of Canada would not participate in national televised debates during the upcoming federal election campaign, another announcement may have slipped by Canadians. In a long expected move, the Harper Conservatives announced they will no longer participate in Question Period.

According to Conservative spokesperson Tory MacTactic, a shadowy figure long associated with Conservative Party election campaigns, “We’ve done that for a long time and we don’t want to do it anymore.”

Upside Down Easy

In the upside down world of the Harper government, easy things are hard to do, and hard things are easy! Thanks for this idea to Susan Abbott (letter to The Globe and Mail, March 5, 2015).

Find the records of 1000 veterans who served in the D-Day offensive? Too hard!

The government of France wanted to award them the French Legion of Honour for their service, but the Harper government only sent the names of about 600. So the other 400 vets who should have been honoured have missed out. The deadline has passed.

Come up with nominees for the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee medals? Easy if you include Conservative hacks, cronies and convicted criminals.

Remember where veterans’ records are kept? Too hard!